"Music is the one art we all have inside. We may not be able to play an instrument, but we can sing along or clap or tap our feet. Have you ever seen a baby bouncing up and down in the crib in time to some music? When you think of it, some of that baby's first messages from his or her parents may have been lullabies, or at least the music of their speaking voices. All of us have had the experience of hearing a tune from childhood and having that melody evoke a memory or a feeling. The music we hear early on tends to stay with us all our lives." (The World According to Mister Rogers, 2003, p.18)
Music has been an important part of my life ever since I was a child. From early on, I have fond memories of hearing the songs of Mister Rogers, my mother singing me to sleep, going to church and singing the songs in the hymnal, participating in the choir, or taking part to sing or play instruments in music class in elementary school. These musical memories followed me to high school and college at Saint Vincent College where I participated in the musicals and choirs. Even into adulthood, I was a part of a chamber choir that introduced me to pieces of music that I had never heard of before. If I hear a song from any of these aspects of my life, it takes me back to these memories and I look upon them as if they were yesterday. Now that I am a mother, I want to create the same musical memories for my daughter.
Musical Memories
Fred Rogers was a gifted musician who wrote and composed his music. In Maxwell King’s book, The Good Neighbor (2018), he highlights that as a young boy, Fred Rogers would listen to musical pieces and then go home and play them on the piano. He further developed his musical abilities at Rollins College in Florida, where he met his wife Sara Joanne Byrd, who was a talented pianist herself.
Music is present at the beginning, at the end, and throughout each episode of Mister Rogers’ Neighborhood. As I start each day with my daughter, I sing her the lyrics "It's a beautiful day in this neighborhood" (from Won’t You Be My Neighbor) and she always smiles because in my heart I believe she knows it will be a good day. Whether it is a rainy day or sunny day I take the words from this song to heart, "Let's make the most of this beautiful day." The days have certainly gone fast since my daughter was born and I want to make the most of each day with her.
As she goes down for a nap, I always sing the song, "It's Such a Good Feeling." I could interject many of the lyrics here, but as you sing it in your head now, I will say this: babies grow so fast and tucking them in for a nap or for the night, they know you will be back "when the day is new" and "you'll have more ideas" for them to grow, engage, and explore.
In addition to making musical memories for my daughter, my husband is a musician himself and is doing the same for her, too. Ever since she was inside the womb, she always loved the sound of music or when Daddy would sing because I always felt her kick. It never failed. Now, in the day-to-day activities with our daughter, we have her listen to a variety of music, from upbeat music to classical music. Also, we sing soft lullabies or dance to fast and fun songs. We also portray different tones and beats for her to listen to and mimic, whether clapping, banging our hands on the table, or stomping our feet.
Doing these musical activities with her makes me think of Episode 1548 (on the topic of Music), when Ella Jenkins comes to visit Mister Rogers with Chuck Aber. They display rhythms with their hands while singing One Potato, Two Potato, and Hambone. Mister Rogers joins in on the fun with Head and Shoulders. By doing these activities ourselves, it is our hope that our daughter can learn to differentiate the soft tones of a lullaby or express loud, happy tones to an upbeat tune. We also want to teach her that she can make different sounds not just with her voice, but with her body as well. It doesn’t have to just be from a musical instrument.
From the Heart
Going into my ninth year as a teacher, I have been a classroom teacher in Kindergarten and third grade. Now, I am going into my second year of teaching for a private academy that also acts as a large homeschooling co-op. Through my teaching experiences, I have incorporated the lessons and music of Fred in one way, shape, or another.
I continue to be in awe of how children today are captivated by Mister Rogers. In this busy world we live in, children stop and listen to the slow, calming voice of Mister Rogers. As a teacher, I need to hear him too. As an adult, I am also fascinated by his slow, calming voice and the predictability of his episodes. Watching Mister Rogers’ Neighborhood as a teacher has taught me the importance of these things for children. In my experience, children respond well to a slow, calming voice instead of an angry or fast voice. In addition, I notice children like when certain things are predictable and structured. I’ve found that children thrive with structure, and it keeps them focused.
In addition to teaching me these important aspects about children, I have also learned the music of Fred Rogers comes from the heart. From my study in the Fred Rogers Institute Archive and through reading a resource created by Gretsch Music Fellow, Katie Palmer, I learned that Fred Rogers often wrote his music from a place he remembered during his childhood or while thinking of an experience or feeling a child might have. This taught me that as a teacher (and a mother), when a child is having a hard time with a lesson or a concept I can remember what it was like to be a child and think of their experience and how they are feeling.
Motherhood/Parenthood
"Being creative is part of being human. Everyone is creative. Each person's creativity finds different forms of outlet, that's true; but without creativity of some kind, I doubt that we'd get through many of the problems that life poses. It's certainly one of the most important coping skills that parents can help their children develop." (You Are Special, 1994, p. 65)
Coming into this world of parenthood, my husband and I have learned to be creative in our day-to-day lives with our daughter. Whether it be narrating everything we do or making a song out of something simple, it is these simple interactions that will make lifelong memories with our daughter. As our daughter grows, it is our hope she finds her own way of being creative, whether it be through music or another outlet. If anything, Fred Rogers has taught us the joy in becoming a parent. We “will relive many of the experiences of the old child” that my husband and I once were, and “such reliving is an inseparable part of ‘parenting’” (You are Special, 1994, p. 136).
Becoming a mother has definitely been one of the hardest challenges I have undertaken, but I would do it over again because of what I am seeing in my daughter at just a young age. I always wanted to be a mother and I certainly got my gift when my daughter was born. She has changed my husband's life and mine for the better and it is hard to imagine life without her.
I wouldn’t have it any other way.
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Molly Kankiewicz is part of our Educators’ Neighborhood learning community (Cohorts 2019-20 & 2020-21; Inquiry Educator, 2021-22; Continuing Participant, 2022-23). Connect with her: mkankiewicz21@gmail.com.